He tries to dial out 9-9-9-9-9-9-9 ..... and other thoughts on a nondescript Wednesday

The complete good works of Brian Eno are playing on the don’t-call-it-an-iPod right now. He had three excellent albums back in the ‘70s, and a fourth that had its moments, but foreshadowed his subsequent incursion into instrumental frippery (no pun intended, for you Eno fans).

Here Come The Warm Jets, Taking Tiger Mountain (By Strategy), Before and After Science, and, to a lesser extent, Another Green World all shine as examples of idiosyncratic, melodic rock that is a constant surprise to the listener. The moments of soothing calm – “Taking Tiger Mountain,” “Everything Merges With The Night,” the grandiose, sweeping “On Some Faraway Beach” – stand in stark contrast to raucous, shambolic rockers like “Needles in the Camel’s Eye,” “King’s Lead Hat” and “The Paw Paw Negro Blowtorch.” There is perfect pop-rock – “Cindy Tells Me,” “Backwater,” “I’ll Come Running” – and noisy, screeching pop-art-rockers – “Blank Frank,” “The True Wheel,” “Baby’s On Fire.” Every note and noise couldn't seem more like it belonged there; Eno’s music from that era is not a bit contrived.

Upsettingly, “Needles in the Camel’s Eye” and “Burning Airlines Give You So Much More” did not transfer to my MP3 player from my computer. This will need remedied, post-haste.


Itching for change, and I don’t mean three dimes and a nickel. The minor blog redesign didn’t hit the spot (what, you didn't notice?) – more needs to be done, because I’m starting to really hate “Sand Dollar,” but none of the other templates do it for me either - and changing the appearance of my desktop and whatnot aren’t doing it either. For a couple of years, I’ve been a Verdana/Tahoma groupie, but when doing the minor redesign here, I wanted a new, more readable blog font, and I fell for Trebuchet, the font that you are looking at now. Now, of course, I’m starting to go off the deep end with the font - make everything Trebuchet! - and I’m sure I’ll burn myself out on it in about 7 hours.

Oh well. Trebuchet still beats the hell out of Comic Sans MS, which should be destroyed. Nothing screams “Warning: amateur!” like the use of Comic Sans MS; it destroys the credibility of the message, IMHO. Here’s a typography snob’s site. The site's proprietor is absolutely correct, by the way.

Anyway, on the change front, we’re doing a bit of an overhaul in the house in the coming weeks, and I hope that quenches my thirst for fluidity. Domestika pointed me in the direction of a free piece of software that Google offers that seems like it would help with home redesign. We’re just doing a minor overhaul (a contradiction in terms, no doubt): a three-room switch in which Son will get his own bedroom, the living room will be moved into the family room (where he presently sleeps) and my office (where Son is moving to) will be relocated to the living room, where it will be combined with the dining room that we don’t currently have.

I know he’s just turning 2 next week, but I think he’s big enough for his own room now. Wife is still a bit paranoid about the prospect, because of the room’s location and the windows in it. But I don’t think we’re going to be taking advantage of the upstairs for anything beyond storage for the foreseeable future, and he needs a room. Grand plans are in the works; aren’t they always? Truly, I’m tired of hearing about them. I used poor judgment about two weekends ago and spoke of my Plan Fatigue to Wife, which caused a seemingly irreversible rift in our marriage, but it healed over (I hope).


Failed commercial idea:

“Thank you for calling OnStar; this is Robert.”

(panicked sobbing) “Yes, I’ve been carjacked.”

“I am sorry to hear that, ma’am. Is the carjacker in the car with you?”

(sobbing) “Yes.”

“OK, I will need your PIN number ………”

(fade out) (announcer goes into spiel about OnStar being available in GM vehicles, etc.)


At the behest of my mom, Wife and I tuned in to the NBC game show “Deal or No Deal” the other night. It happened to be on at the same time as the Brawl For It All between Son and Transient. So, we were a little distracted while the show was on.

Regardless, even if I were fully focused on the show, I couldn't imagine a more tedious, monotonous, mindblowingly boring way to spend an hour. They should call it “Dull or No Dull,” and then after selecting the first six cases, I would holler out, “Dull!”


The fanfare with which I announced my entry into the Next Great Sportswriter contest on foxsports.com has, I admit, not been matched by results. It may seem like I own stock in Half-Ass and Half-Ass LLC, and I wouldn’t blame you, Gentle Reader, for thinking as such, seeing as how a million years pass between posts here some weeks.

Honestly, I have a couple of things brewing that are pending replies from interested parties. I’m working on a piece on the U.S. men’s curling team’s success in the Olympics and if there was any ensuing big deals brewing as a result. I e-mailed the folks at USA Curling, the national organization, and they said they would be happy to help. Their initial enthusiasm hasn’t resulted in an actual reply to my questions, though. (I’ll check my e-mail right now before I go off half-cocked …)

Nothing.

Ugh. I hope that it’s because they’re tracking down answers; I had some pretty varied questions that the PR folks there might not be able to answer on their own … right?

My other pending post is about my former athletic “glory.” If you roll your eyes and think that it’s going to be an Al-Bundy-four-touchdowns story that bears ignoring, think again. There’s a reason why “glory” is in quotes there.