The 40-year-old virgin and his child bride

At first, I believed that there was no good reason to comment on this story, but then I reconsidered for reasons that will become apparent. It's a bad story, about a bad man and a misguided, stupid teenager who thinks she knows what's best for her and honestly has no clue.

Trust me: that's not just the chastity-belt devotee in me talking, either. Rather, my personal experience in a somewhat similar situation gives me the authority to add my $.02 and halfway sound like I know what I'm talking about.

In a nutshell, the story linked above tells the story of a 40-year-old cross-country coach in the Carolinas and one of his 16-year-old female runners. The cross-country coach, who was also a teacher, resigned his position after marrying that girl. The Letorneau case brought to light a lot of these teacher-student relationships that are incredibly damaging to teens, to communities, to the concept of trust that is supposed to exist between educators and their young charges, and this is another sad example.

Here's my story:

I, too, was the Smartest Teenager in the World about 15 years ago. I fell in with someone twice my age at that point - amazing what a little "attention" can do for a boy who really didn't get any of that kind of attention up to that point - and am just thankful that I didn't marry her like she begged as time wore on. I can't imagine the shitheap that my life would be now if I had - not that it's the Ritz today, mind you, but still way better than what the alternative could have been.

Despite the best efforts of my friends and family, who I went on to alienate over the course of those three years, I stayed with her till the bitter end, because dammit, I was almost an adult and knew what was best for me, and the hell with everyone who tried to steer me down the right course. They didn't understand, I rationalized, so fuck'em. (Yes, this was my actual thought process. Not bad, huh?)

In retrospect, it was the dumbest three years of my life. And, truth be told, I regret it every day. It's a scar that will not heal, despite the fact that it's been almost 12 years since I went down in flames, standing in the rain at a payphone calling my mom with my last roll of quarters and telling her how right she was.

*****

If I had any advice for Windy, the child bride in the linked article above, it'd be this:

You're 16, so you don't understand the concept of "regret." Be assured that maybe 3 years from now, if you graduate high school and go on to college (a long shot, at this point - let's be frank here), or maybe 10 years from now, you will wake up and ask yourself, "What have I done?" And then after the end, after you've managed to move on and maybe even start a family with someone who's really way more understanding than you'll deserve, who will overlook the fact that you are damaged goods, you'll continue to ask yourself, "What was I thinking?"

This is something you'll have to live with, the weight you'll have to carry.

I don't know your supposed attraction (infatuation) with a predator who, right now, is 2 1/2 times your age. (What - is the word "predator" too strong a term? What else could it be, really?) And have you considered his "attraction" to you? Surely you don't think that your love was built on the fact that he shares your affection for The Cheetah Girls, do you?

Honest to God, Windy. I don't blame you. Not in the least. You made a decision that, in your mind, seems "right" - which speaks volumes for the quality of education in your school, I suppose.

You know how to run, so do it. Please. For your own sake, for the sake of your family, for the sake of your conscience some years from now.

Trust me when I tell you that everything I just told you is right.

****

I can't even muster the righteous indignation required for a response to the parents, who apparently (at gunpoint?) agreed to the sham of a marriage that their daughter finds herself in now.

And I can't find the proper words for the teacher/coach in the story. Not without including the phrase "fuck off and die in a river of shit." That said - how dare you damage this girl who is 24 years your junior! 24 years!!! What, your life hasn't panned out as you'd hoped, so you might as well perpetuate the misery by ruining some poor girl's life/hopes/dreams? You are ridiculous and, quite frankly, you need stop being so Goddamned selfish, put your thing back in your pants and reconsider the harm that you're doing to her; I don't care how "beautiful" your love is.